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Private Dick

Manufacturer: Private Collection

Great name. Somewhere, Dashiell with a is smiling.

A healthy serving of man-meat, with a disquieting similarity to The Real Thing. Eight full inches, with a solidity and heft and a pleasing attention to details. The foreskin is pulled back and the head is a lighter shade than the shaft. The surface is mottled with real-looking veins and skin texture, and the scrotum is contracted into the familiar ready-for-action posture. There's even a suction cup on the end. Pop it on the wall and it can double as a coat rack on those slushy winter days.

Comes with a handful 6-ml packets of lube, in case just looking at it doesn't do the job. And guys, if your sig-other likes it as much as mine did, don't be a spoilsport and point out that it will not make the car payment. It won't help.


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